Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Ironman St. George: Here I come!

So yes, my last blog wasn’t particularly cheerful but I do want to keep things honest and real. We all know life isn’t always beautiful and can be down right cruel at times though the things that keep us moving forward with our head held high is what makes it all worth while. I asked the question…How do I make my cowplop into something ridiculously amazing? Well, I came up with my answer.

Obviously, I went through a series of misfortunate events that led to what I deemed as failure. There I was sitting on my coach sobbing uncontrollably over my salad. Mike looked at me with his Oh no eyes. I decided to separate from my team and now felt completely naked. I no longer had sponsors or teammates. I only want to make people happy and currently have made quite a few people very upset with my decisions. Of course, Mike attempts to explain to me that this is business and you have to make business decisions. I know it was the right choice but it certainly wasn’t easy. I just couldn’t stop thinking that I really let Mike down because he has given me so much to let me go after these big dreams.

We had to build bikes, unbuild bikes, buy new parts, return new parts. I mean it has literally been in and out of the bike shops everyday and oh yes, here’s my credit card. Ugh. Walking away from my team, I have to give up race bonuses, status and swallow my pride because I will be racing bare. I’m ok with that just feel that I have taken one million steps backwards. What honestly changed everything was Mike looking at me and saying What will make you happiest? So, in between my pathetic weeping sobs, I mumbled something like I WANT TO RACE ST. GEAORGE. Yes, that was my answer. I am certainly not in what I consider ironman shape but what I do know is that I am ecstatic to be racing on Saturday. I love long and hills and 26 miles of pure running adventure. I feel naughty as it almost something I shouldn’t do but to hell with what’s right! I have had 6 days to think about this race and my thoughts are this…let’s just have fun. Givem’ Hell but no pressure, no stress, no nerves. I almost didn’t want to tell anyone that I was racing because then I feel pressure to perform but I realize, at this moment in my life, I need support. Hey…I am stronger and faster than I have ever been in my entire life and if, by chance, I go 14 hours…who cares?! I’m going to give it what I have and that’s all I can do. I’m excited for Saturday and everything that it brings. I know I will fall back in love with this sport and am hoping for a few small miracles.

Pray for my broken little body. I hope to do well for every one of you that has been pulling for me. All the little notes sent my way have given me that extra bit of courage and determination that I’ve needed. This race is for you!

7 comments:

MandyB said...

Hang in there, Kate and have a GREAT race! You know yourself better than anyone and in time, everything will be coming up Kate! Go get 'em!

CathCremer said...

I love your posts. I always just remember when I use to babysit you. Oh how you have grown. You are going to do great on Saturday. The Cremer's will be following you online.

Ewa said...

I had to look up St George and it is an amazing race. You just go and have a time of your life. Gosh, Kate you are quite a inspiration.
Good luck on Saturday. Can't wait to read all about it.

sallyaston said...

Hang tough and let it all out on that course! Good luck! :-)

rachel bueche said...

Good luck for St George Ironman -looking forward to your posts about it - all the best from Germany!!!

tarathoner said...

Go Kate! You inspire so many of us! Thank you for standing up for what you believe in, and most importantly, believing in yourself. Whatever decisions you have made recently, your heart knows it is for the best. Have a blast out there, and we will be behind you all the way!!

Roadie in Vancouver said...

Really sorry to hear that you left TBB, you've made a great impression on those of us who got to know you through your blog posts there. Anyway, that's life, and hope you do well going forward.